"Eviil, like fruits of the deviil!"

[miss_squiddy]

Hah. Sometimes I am so funny. As I was walking into town last night, this happened:

Gang of studenty lads: "Do you know where the Sherman Theatre is?"
Me: "Yes."
Gang of studenty lads: *expectant looks*
Me:...
Gang of studenty lads: *confused looks*
Me: *Smile*
Gang of studenty lads: *Nervous shuffling*
Me: "Oh! Do you want to know where it is then?"
Gang of studenty lads: "Yes. Please."

When I'm walking down quiet streets at night, I sometimes walk quite closely behind people who are heading in the same direction. Not weirdly close, but just close enough to freak them out ever so slightly...

I am mean.

Comments

[poggs.livejournal.com]

*smirk*

That's as evil as my reply I want to give to a Scientologist:

"Hi, free stress test?"
"I'M NOT F***ING STRESSED, ALRIGHT? JUST LEAVE ME ALONE!"

or

"Hi, can we talk to you about Dianetics?"
"Sorry, I'm lactose intolerant"

[miss_squiddy]

I have been known to use

"Could I talk to you about [insert evil charity which hassles people on the street]?"

"No. Sorry. I hate [children/foreigners/endangered species".

I will give them my money and I will sign the petitions but I will do it because I want to and not because I've been penned in by a group of people in little coloured bibs.

[miss_squiddy]

Mmmm. Tactful, aren't we?

Something interesting I found out the other day was that those rose selling companies flog flowers on behalf of 6 or 7 small charities at a time and donate to them a standard rate of £2,000 per month, which, if you're a small charity is a pretty good income.

But the flower sellers make £20,000 a month. And even after you take off capital costs and overheads, that's a MASSIVE profit margin. On the other hand, Amnesty and companies like that who get you to hand in your bank details and take out an annual or monthly subscription deliberately choose a random and innocuous amount because they rely on people forgetting to check their bank statements and signing up time and time again.

You learn interesting things when you work for a charity. Never give money to people on the street. Make informaed decisions and one-off donations.

[toxicpixie.livejournal.com]

I find 'No thanks, I already ate' works on pretty much everything from leafleters to Scientologists.

Nathan, the Toxic Pixie

[evilpixielady.livejournal.com]

i often wonder why you attract freaks, and know it becomes obvious...they are being drawn to you because YoU ARE ONE OF THEM!!!...bloody weirdo.

know i just have to figure out why the effect is magnifoed when we are together...hmmmm....

hugs
h

PS NEVER walk behind me again...you scare me lol

[miss_squiddy]

*LOOM!*

[thepussykat.livejournal.com]

eeeevil Squidy! Take another pint of beer and definitely pass the whalebones of go ness

[recursived.livejournal.com]

Weird, as I was walking into town last night, two guys asked me the way to Adamsdown. Myself being Civic Duty Man, however, I felt honour-bound to attempt to give honest directions.

[miss_squiddy]

Oh, I gave them the right directions in the end... "Turn left under the bridge and then as straight on as you can manage until you get there." I think that was OK.

[recursived.livejournal.com]

There's an art to giving directions, about the only thing I learnt from cubs/scouts.

You've just reminded me :)

[ahura-mazda.livejournal.com]

One of my favourite passtimes when I was living in Brecon (very narrow pavements) was to quitely sneak up behind police when they were walking in twos, with Reuben and James in a double buggy, and just as I got behind them shout "excuse me" and charge through them, forcing at least one flustering and panicing, (if not both) into the road and therefore traffic - "Oh sorry!" (doing the whole stressed out mum thing) and charge on about my way, smirking and with a sense of achievement.

Thought I'd share - one mad bird to another :)

Re: You've just reminded me :)

[miss_squiddy]

Heh heh heh. I almost ran over a policewoman yesterday because she ran out in front of me just after clearing up an RTA. Not the most sensible plan ever really.

[tintintin.livejournal.com]

If I can't be bothered when someone asks me for directions, I either shrug or send them in a random direction and let them fend for themselves.

I also occasionally stare people out on the tube. That's a lot of fun, I must say.

[miss_squiddy]

I quite enjoy smiling randomly at nothing when I'm on the tube by myself. People generally tend to think that you're a bit loopy.

I think you should try looking concerned and staring at someone's forehead/shoulder/knee and see how long it takes them to start checking that it's OK.

[silent-olie.livejournal.com]

I've been doing the random smile thing lately - mostly due to my good mood - and people keep looking at me like I've just threatened them with a can of petrol and a lighter.
It's like when you let people get on a bus/train first or give up a seat - people just don't seem to be prepared for niceness.

[miss_squiddy]

Americans always seem to be very nice and polite and helpful. It's scary. I don't like it.

[scottmac702.livejournal.com]

I sometimes sit next to people on the bus and stare at them till they get off.

[sheepthief.livejournal.com]

Next time you see a sign in a shop window along the lines of "please come in and look around", go in, and stand in the middle of the shop looking around. When an assistant asks you if they can help, just mention the sign on the door.

[miss_squiddy]

Heh heh. We are all dreadful people!

[nicnac.livejournal.com]

Gill and I once got cornered by a religious fundamentalist on Queen St and he gave Gill the full on convert-or-be-damned speech. Gill asked why he wasn't trying to convert me and he said that it was too late, my soul was doomed to eternal torment, he could see it in my eyes! Hmph.